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Being the Eldest Sibling in a Nigerian Home isn't Easy

General 13 hrs ago
  • User
    Sashasmart
    13 hrs ago

     

    In every Nigerian home, there’s an unspoken responsibility placed on the shoulders of the eldest child, especially when the parents are not so financially boyant.It’s a mix of silent sacrifice, leadership, pressure, and unexpected pride. Being the eldest sibling isn't a position you apply for — you're born into it. But over time, you realize it's not just a title. It's a training ground.

    🧱 The Weight of Responsibility

     

    Growing up, I didn't always understand why I had to act like a “mini-parent.”

    Why I had to cook first.

    Sweep first.

    Hold things together when it seemed like everything was falling apart.

     

    While my younger siblings played freely, I was often the one holding back tears just to look strong. I had to be the bridge between my parents and the rest of the family, even when I was still figuring out life myself.

     

    From helping with school fees, to guiding younger siblings through their WAEC exams, sometimes the load felt too heavy. No one teaches you how to be the eldest — you just learn by doing.

     

    💔 The Challenges are Real

     

    Unseen pressure: You’re expected to succeed first, so others can follow.

     

    Limited freedom: While your peers make mistakes and bounce back, your mistakes affect the whole family.

     

    Financial burden: Especially in Nigerian homes, you're often called upon early to support the family financially — even when you’re still trying to stand on your own.

     

    Loneliness: Sometimes, you're the strong one for everyone else but have no one being strong for you.

     

     

    But amidst all this...

     

    🌱 The Successes Come Quietly

     

    There’s a deep, indescribable joy when you realize your efforts helped your siblings move forward. Maybe your sister finally got into university. Your brother got his first job and called to say, “Na because of you o, big sis/bro.”

    Or your parents, for the first time, said: “We’re proud of you.”

     

    You become a pillar your family can lean on. And over time, that quiet strength you built becomes your greatest asset in life.

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