I believe in equal rights. I believe women should vote, lead, earn, and choose. I believe in dismantling patriarchy. I am a feminist. But when I am on a date, I expect the man to pay. When I imagine marriage, I expect him to be the primary provider. When I am in distress, I want him to protect me. And yes, I want him to be taller, stronger, and more financially successful than me. Is this hypocrisy? Or is it human nature? I have tried the 50/50 life. I dated a man who believed in splitting everything. We split rent. We split dates. We split holidays. And I lost attraction to him. Not because he was poor, but because I felt like I was dating a roommate, not a partner. I want to feel chosen. I want to feel provided for. I want the luxury of vulnerability that patriarchy theoretically denies me but practically offers through male provision. Modern feminism tells us to reject all of this. But my body, my instincts, and my desires disagree with my politics. I am in a w@r between my ideology and my biology. I want equality in the boardroom but chivalry in the bedroom. I want to be a boss at work but a babygirl at home. Can a woman be a feminist and still want traditional male provision? Or must we pick a lane and stay in it? Men, does this make you angry? Women, do you secretly feel the same? Let's have the uncomfortable conversation.
