You order a shoe on Jumia. The picture shows Nike. The price is suspiciously low. You buy it anyway. Three days later, a delivery man calls. You rush out. The box is right. You open it. Inside is a shoe that looks like Nike's cousin who went to a different school. The logo is "Nkie." The sole is plastic. The size is wrong. And the return policy requires you to pay for shipping back to Lagos. This is the Nigerian online shopping experience. The gap between expectation and reality is a canyon. The models wear clothes that fit. You receive clothes made for someone else. The electronics are "refurbished," which means "previously broken and quickly fixed." But we keep ordering. Because the alternative is markets where you haggle for hours. Because the convenience is addictive. Because sometimes, just sometimes, you get exactly what you ordered, and it feels like winning the lottery. What's your worst online shopping disaster? And do you still trust e-commerce in Nigeria?