My grandmother is 78 years old. She doesn't trust ATMs. She calls every smartphone "computer." And she believes Wi-Fi is a type of mosquito. So imagine my surprise when she announced one morning: "My children, I am now an influencer." π³ The entire family froze. My uncle laughed. "Mama, do you even know what an influencer is?" Grandma adjusted her glasses. "Of course." "What is it?" "It is somebody that influences." ππππ Technically correct. Unfortunately, that was all she knew. The problem started when my cousin gifted her a smartphone. Within two weeks, Grandma had joined every social media platform known to mankind. Facebook. TikTok. Instagram. WhatsApp. And somehow, three apps nobody in the family had ever heard of. π Every morning she posted something. Day 1: "Drink water and mind your business." Day 2: "If your husband is stressing you, return him to his mother." ππ Day 3: "People who don't greet elders properly will soon discover things." ππ The shocking part? People loved it. Her videos started getting thousands of views. Then tens of thousands. Then hundreds of thousands. Nobody understood why. Even Grandma didn't understand. One afternoon she called me. "Nicky!" "Yes, Grandma?" "My video has reached 500,000." "Views?" "I don't know. People are reaching it." πππ Then she became unstoppable. Companies started contacting her. One woman messaged: "We would like to collaborate." Grandma replied: "Collaborate on what?" The woman replied: "A brand deal." Grandma: "Is it dangerous?" ππ Soon she started recording videos everywhere. In the market. In church parking lots. At weddings. Even during family meetings. One day she interrupted a serious argument between two uncles. "Wait." Everyone stopped. "What now, Mama?" She pointed her phone at them. "Argue again." πππ The video got 2 million views. People in the comments called it: "Nigerian Family Drama Episode 1." π The real madness happened when she went live for the first time. Grandma didn't know the camera was already recording. For ten minutes, viewers watched her searching for her glasses. The glasses were on her head. πππ Over 50,000 people watched. Somebody commented: "Protect this woman at all costs." Another wrote: "This is the best content on the internet." ππ Then came the ultimate twist. At a family gathering, Grandma arrived wearing sunglasses. My uncle asked: "Mama, why the glasses?" Grandma smiled. "Privacy." "Privacy from who?" "My fans." ππππ The same woman who once asked whether TikTok was a cough medicine now had fans. Actual fans. The family accepted defeat. And whenever anybody annoyed her, she'd simply point her phone at them and say: "Careful." "Why?" "You don't want to go viral." πππ π€£ Funny Lesson: Never underestimate Nigerian grandmothers. Give them a smartphone and enough confidence, and they might become famous before you even learn how to use the app properly. π΅π±π₯π Follow me for your daily dose of laughter