There is a special type of unemployment in Nigeria. The type where a person is jobless but somehow becomes busier than everyone else. That was my neighbor, Chuks. One Monday morning, we woke up and saw a brand-new signboard outside his room. "CHUKS INTERNATIONAL INVESTIGATION SERVICES" We Discover What Others Cannot Discover. π π³π³π³ The entire street gathered. Aunty Rita asked: "Chuks, when did you become an investigator?" Chuks adjusted his sunglasses. "Since this morning." ππππ "What training do you have?" "Natural talent." π The first case came that same day. A woman stormed into his office. "My husband is behaving suspiciously." Chuks nodded seriously. "I shall investigate." The woman paid him β¦2,000. Chuks immediately followed the husband. For three hours. Under the hot sun. Like a movie detective. The husband entered a supermarket. Chuks entered. The husband bought bread. Chuks bought bread. The husband bought milk. Chuks bought milk. ππ At one point the husband turned around. "Why are you following me?" Chuks panicked. "I'm not following you." "Then why are you buying exactly what I'm buying?" ππππ The investigation ended with one conclusion: The husband was simply buying groceries. Case closed. The woman demanded a refund. π But Chuks refused to quit. The next week he got another case. Someone's chicken was missing. π Chuks arrived at the scene wearing a borrowed suit. He walked around examining footprints. He interviewed witnesses. He even drew diagrams. Three hours later he made an announcement. "I have solved it." Everyone leaned forward. "Who stole the chicken?" Chuks pointed dramatically. "The chicken." π "What?" "The chicken escaped." πππ The chicken was found behind a nearby shop eating corn. Investigation complete. π Business surprisingly improved. People kept bringing him weird cases. Missing slippers. Lost generators. Disappearing soup. Broken relationships. One man even hired him to find out who kept stealing his Wi-Fi. πππ Then came the case that destroyed everything. A rich landlord hired Chuks to investigate missing rent money. "This is serious," the landlord warned. Chuks nodded. "Leave it to me." For five days he worked tirelessly. Questioning tenants. Taking notes. Looking important. Finally he called everyone together. "I know who took the money." π³ The crowd gasped. "Who?" Chuks pointed dramatically. "The landlord." Complete silence. πππ The landlord nearly swallowed his tongue. "What nonsense!" Chuks proudly opened his notebook. "According to my findings, you forgot where you kept it." ππππ The landlord rushed into his room. Five minutes later he returned. The money was inside an old Bible. Exactly where he had hidden it. ππ The crowd exploded. People started clapping. Chuks started bowing. The landlord was furious. "You didn't investigate anything!" Chuks smiled. "But I solved the case." πππ The next morning his signboard changed. "CHUKS CONSULTING SERVICES" Aunty Rita asked: "What happened to investigations?" Chuks sighed. "Too much risk." "What do you consult on?" "Anything." ππ π€£ Funny Lesson: In Nigeria, confidence can create a business, but it takes results to keep it alive. Also, before accusing thieves, check your hiding places first. πππ Goodnight fellas