Their bio says "Homebody. Netflix and chill. I don't do crowds." They are at the club tonight. They were at the beach last weekend. They were at three weddings this month. They are currently posting a story from a lounge with the caption "Rare night out." The "I don't go out" person is a Nigerian social media staple. They have built an identity around staying home. They post about introversion. They share memes about canceling plans. They claim to not like crowds, noise, and people. Meanwhile, their location history is more active than a delivery driver. And the performance! When they do go out, they must announce it as an exception. "I never do this, but..." "Forced myself out tonight..." "My friends dragged me..." The narrative is that they are reluctantly social. The reality is that they are consistently social but need the introvert badge for authenticity. The contradiction is harmless. The comedy is real. They are at every event, complaining about being there, posting about being there, and returning next week. The "I don't go out" person goes out more than the "I love parties" person. The latter is probably home, watching them post. Are you the "I don't go out" person who is always out? Or do you actually stay home while watching others perform?