She said it for years. "Igbo men appreciate women." "Igbo men have sense." "Igbo men know how to treat a lady." Her mother heard it. Her friends heard it. Her ancestors heard it. Then she brought home an Igbo man. The mother was confused. The ancestors were consulted. The friends were supportive but suspicious. The Igbo man was nice. The Igbo man was respectful. The Igbo man was... not what she expected. The tribal dating preference is a Nigerian tradition. The Yoruba girl who only wants Igbo men. The Igbo man who only wants Calabar women. The Hausa woman who only wants Fulani men. The preferences are specific. The preferences are stereotypes. The preferences are destiny, until they're not. And the reality! The Igbo man who doesn't "appreciate women" the way she was promised. The Yoruba man who actually has the sense she was seeking. The person who checks every tribal box but fails every human one. The preference becomes prison. The prison becomes lesson. The plot twist is always the same. The person who breaks the preference is the person who doesn't fit the stereotype. The Yoruba man who cooks. The Igbo woman who is "submissive" but not submissive. The person who is human before they are tribe. Did you have a tribal preference that life destroyed? And what actually matters more than tribe?
