"I don't care about money. I just want someone kind. Someone faithful. Someone who understands me." Meanwhile, their "kind" requires fine dining. Their "faithful" requires weekend getaways. Their "understanding" requires gifts that demonstrate comprehension of their specific brand preferences. The materialism is not in the words. It's in the requirements. And the performance! The "surprise me" that judges the surprise. The "anything is fine" that is never fine. The "I don't need much" that needs quite a lot. The materialism is hidden in expectations. The expectations are hidden in standards. The standards are hidden in "I just know my worth." But the honesty! Some people own it. "I like nice things. I want a partner who can provide them." No shame. No hiding. Just direct transaction. The honesty is refreshing. The honesty is rare. Most prefer the "I'm not materialistic" performance with the materialistic reality. The confusion is for the partner. The person who heard "kind" and thought "kind." Who heard "faithful" and thought "faithful." Who didn't realize these virtues had price tags attached. Who is now confused about why their kindness feels insufficient. Are you materialistic and honest, or materialistic and hiding? And how do you spot the difference in others?
