The Most Dangerous Place in the House People think the most dangerous place in the house is the kitchen because of knives and hot water. Wrong. The most dangerous place is the bathroom when you're taking a shower. That's where all your embarrassing memories began to show up You could be peacefully washing your hair when suddenly your brain says: "Remember that stupid thing you said in 2018?" And just like that, your day is ruined. The memory always arrives in high definition. You remember the exact words, the exact people, and the exact moment you wanted the ground to swallow you whole. Then you start arguing with a person who isn't even there. "No, what I SHOULD have said was..." Five minutes later, you're giving an award-winning speech to the shampoo bottle. Another dangerous place is the kitchen at midnight. You walk in for a glass of water. The cookies see you. You see the cookies. Both of you know what's about to happen. You tell yourself, "Just one." Ten minutes later, the cookie packet is empty and you're investigating the fridge like a detective searching for clues. Meanwhile, parents have a special superpower. They can fall asleep anywhere. The sofa. The chair. In front of the TV. But the moment you make the smallest noise, they wake up and ask, "Who is that?" As if a burglar would answer, "Good evening, sir. It's me, the thief. Just grabbing the television and leaving." Life is funny when you think about it. We're all just trying our best, forgetting passwords we created ourselves, talking to people who can't hear us in the shower, and promising we'll only eat one cookie. Nobody believes that last one.
