Stage 1: "God when?" You see the engagement post. The new car. The housewarming. The promotion. Your fingers type before your brain approves. "God when?" It's not jealousy. It's aspiration. It's prayer with a question mark. It's hope dressed as humor. Stage 2: "God when na?" The question mark becomes urgent. The posts keep coming. Your peers keep progressing. Your timeline is a highlight reel of everyone else's life. The "when" is no longer casual. It's desperate. It's daily. It's a mantra of delayed expectation. Stage 3: "God abeg." The tone shifts. The question becomes plea. The aspiration becomes exhaustion. "God abeg" is not asking when. It's asking why. Why not me? Why them? Why now? Why never? The "abeg" is tired. The "abeg" is wounded. The "abeg" is still hoping, but barely. Stage 4: "God dey." The acceptance. The resignation. The "it will happen in its time" that you tell yourself while scrolling past another announcement. The "God dey" is survival. It's the only place left when "when" and "abeg" have been exhausted. It's faith on life support. And the cycle! You think you've reached "God dey." Then someone posts their miracle. And you're back to "God when?" The pipeline is infinite. The journey is universal. The destination is unclear. Which stage are you in right now? And how long have you been there?