"Who send you message?" is the Nigerian response to unwanted opinions. You offer advice. You comment on someone's life. You suggest a better way. The response comes: "Who send you message?" Translation: I did not ask you. Your input is unwelcome. Mind your business. The phrase is defensive, aggressive, and surprisingly effective. The culture of unsolicited advice is strong in Nigeria. Aunties comment on weight. Uncles comment on marriage. Strangers comment on parenting. Everyone has an opinion on your life. "Who send you message?" is the rebellion. The boundary. The declaration that your life is yours to mess up. But the hypocrisy! The same person who says "Who send you message?" gives unsolicited advice constantly. They comment on politics. They judge celebrities. They offer opinions on everything. The defense is selective. It applies only when they are the target. And the loneliness! Sometimes the "message" was love. The auntie who warned about a bad partner. The friend who suggested a career change. The "who send you message?" defense burns bridges. It rejects care along with criticism. Have you used "Who send you message?" And was it boundary-setting, or was it bridge-burning?
