Why Marriages Fail

‎17 Dangerous People You Must Protect Your Marriage From

‎By Pastor Bisi Adewale

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‎Years ago, a newlywed couple came to one of our marriage conferences. They looked happy, full of life and dreams. But just two years later, their marriage crashed like a house of cards. The wife came back crying, asking for help. What happened? Was it infidelity? Abuse? Financial crisis?

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‎No.

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‎It was “advice.” A single friend who constantly told the wife, "You don’t have to take nonsense from a man, you’re too pretty for that," and an overbearing mother-in-law who never gave them room to grow. They were surrounded by dangerous people who looked innocent on the outside but were destroying the foundation of their marriage.

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‎Listen to me, beloved, the problem in many homes today isn’t the couple. It’s the people they have allowed into their circle. Yes, people you call “mummy,” “daddy,” “bestie,” “pastor,” and even “uncle” can be the reason your marriage is not working.

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‎Let me show you 17 dangerous people you must protect your marriage from — and please, take this seriously. Marriage is sacred. It’s not a playground for other people’s experiments.

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‎1. The “Single and Bitter” Best Friend

‎This is that friend who has never been married but always has a strong opinion about your spouse. They’re quick to say things like, "If I were you, I would never tolerate that!" Beware, bitterness speaks louder than love in their world.

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‎2. The Over-Spiritual Pastor Who Doesn't Believe in Boundaries

‎Yes, even pastors can become a threat when they do not respect the privacy and intimacy of a couple. If your pastor is always calling your spouse privately or getting involved in your arguments, that’s not mentorship, that’s manipulation.

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‎3. The Jealous Ex

‎They act like they’re over you, but somehow they keep showing up in your DMs, commenting on your posts, or dropping emotional messages. An ex who isn’t dead to your heart is a mine waiting to explode in your marriage.

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‎4. The Overbearing Mother-in-law or Father-in-law

‎Parents are a blessing, but when they become dictators in your marriage, you must draw the line. Your spouse must come first. Any parent who demands more loyalty than your spouse is a threat to your home.

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‎5. The Family Member Who Hates Your Spouse

‎They never wanted you to marry him/her in the first place, and now they subtly poison you with words. “Are you even happy?” “You’ve changed since you married.” They sow doubt, not love.

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‎6. The Friend Who Encourages Secrets

‎This is the friend who says things like, "You don't have to tell your husband everything." But secrets breed suspicion, and suspicion kills trust. A friend that supports secrecy is a silent destroyer.

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‎7. The “Marriage Counselor” on Social Media

‎We are in the age of influencers and YouTubers who claim to be relationship experts. They speak with confidence but have no fruit to show for it. Be careful where you get your marriage food, not every advice is from God.

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‎8. The Career Mentor Who Doesn’t Value Marriage

‎This could be your boss, mentor, or senior colleague who constantly mocks family life, encourages late nights, and praises divorcees as “free and focused.” You will start seeing your spouse as a hindrance instead of a partner.

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‎9. The Sibling Who Takes Sides

‎Marriage needs unity. But when a sibling always takes your side even when you’re wrong, especially in front of your spouse, it fosters pride and destroys reconciliation.

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‎10. The Overfriendly Opposite-Sex Colleague

‎They may seem harmless at first. But over time, emotional connections develop. You begin to share what you should only tell your spouse. From “colleague” to “confidant” is a very short road. Protect your heart.

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‎11. The Gossiping Church Member

‎They are not happy until they know the latest quarrel in your home. They call to “check on you” but end the call by reporting what your spouse said or did to other members. Block such people with the power of distance.

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‎12. The Family Elder Who Supports Abuse

‎Some elders will say things like, “Just endure it, that’s how men are,” even when you are in an abusive relationship. That is not wisdom, that is wickedness disguised as tradition.

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‎13. The Exalted 'Daddy G.O' Who Demotes Your Husband

‎When your spiritual leader becomes more powerful in your heart than your husband, it becomes a threat. Your pastor is not your priest in the home — your husband is. Honor your pastor but never at the expense of your marriage.

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‎14. The Flirtatious Friend of Your Spouse

‎You’ve noticed them, always calling, touching, laughing too much around your husband or wife. Flirting is not harmless. Don’t wait until it becomes an affair before you act.

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‎15. The Parent Who Still Treats You Like a Child

‎This parent dictates your every move, makes your decisions, and disrespects your spouse. They see your marriage as an extension of their authority. Cut the emotional umbilical cord, you’re married now!

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‎16. The “Prayer Partner” Turned Emotional Affair

‎Be careful with spiritual closeness with the opposite sex. Prayer is powerful, but it also opens deep emotional intimacy. Many emotional affairs started in prayer meetings. Be spiritually wise.

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‎17. YOU, Yes, You!

‎Sometimes the most dangerous person in a marriage is the one in it. Your stubbornness, anger, immaturity, and inability to forgive may be the biggest threat of all. Protect your marriage from yourself — grow, learn, and humble yourself.

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‎CONCLUSION: 

‎Marriage is like a garden, if you don’t protect it, intruders will come in and trample on your flowers. Adam failed to guard the garden, and the serpent walked in. Don’t be like Adam.

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‎Draw clear boundaries. Be sensitive. Protect your home. Block access. Delete numbers. Say NO, even to people you love — if their presence is poisoning your marriage.

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‎God gave you a spouse, not a crowd. Don’t let outsiders destroy what you and God are building.

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‎Protect your home like your life depends on it, because it does.